POSTER DE BLONDE
Personalised 5-star toilet reviews print — what your guests really think
You started a design here. It is saved on this device.
Reading room · Free
The Murphys’ Loo
Worth the detour
5
4
3
2
1
Open 24 hours · except when Dad's reading
- Wi-Fi (patchy)
- Reading material
- Spare roll
- Slippers welcome
- Soundproofing
- View of the door
Popular times
Right now: busier than usual
Reviews
Uncle Pat
2 days ago
Lovely spot. Read the whole Sunday paper in here, racing pages included.
Siobhan
a week ago
No loo roll. Nobody warned me.
Nana
3 months ago
Great selection of reading. Mostly shampoo bottles, but still.
The cat
a year ago
Soft bath mat, nobody bothers me. I sleep here now.
Response from the owner
Please leave this toilet as you would wish to find it.
The average rating is worked out from the stars in the reviews. The preview is exactly what will be printed.
Your loo as a 5-star listing: a rating worked out from the stars, up to four reviews signed by family and friends, opening hours, popular times and the owner’s response. Four styles, from app to neon. 250 g matte paper, A4 to 70 × 100 cm, or a print-ready file.
First the object — medium, size, frame — then its content, which you watch take shape in the preview.
Ready to give: printed in our Estaing workshop and shipped within 48 h, with an optional frame on A4 and 30 × 40.
For a last-minute gift: the print file, €8.90, arrives by link the same day — PDF and PNG at 300 dpi, all five sizes.
See the five sizes to scale
Step 4 of 4: Write the listing place · style · reviews · response
Your personalisation
Check the spelling: the poster is printed exactly as is, to order.
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Printed in AveyronComposed and printed in our family workshop in Aveyron, checked before it ships.
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Printed to order250 g matte paper, pigment inks: printed in our Aveyron workshop, whatever the size.
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Shipped within 48 hTo your door or to a pickup point, by La Poste or Colissimo.
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Ready to giveStandard frame sizes, easy to find.
Secure payment
Full description
Your loo, finally rated the way it deserves: a proper listing, with its score, its stars and reviews from everyone who’s been through. “Lovely spot. Read the whole Sunday paper in here” — five stars, Uncle Pat. “No loo roll. Nobody warned me” — two stars, Siobhan. The average is worked out from the stars you give, the bar chart follows, and the number of reviews would make a five-star hotel jealous.
You name the place — “The Murphys’ Loo” — and write up to four reviews with the names of family and friends, or pick at random from our ideas. Opening hours (“Open 24 hours · except when Dad’s reading”), popular times, facilities and the owner’s response complete the listing. Four styles: app, old travel guide, neon, newspaper review. The preview updates as you type, and it is exactly what gets printed.
- 250 g matte paper, pigment inks, printed to order.
- Five sizes: A4, 30 × 40, 40 × 60, 50 × 70 and 70 × 100 cm.
- Optional wooden frame on the A4 and 30 × 40, black, white or natural.
- Or the print-ready file: all five sizes, each as a PDF and a 300 dpi PNG, by download link.
The poster, once printed
Scenes and people generated by AI.
Sizes
A4 · 21 × 29.7 cm
The keepsake: a birth, the sky of one date. Everyone owns an A4 frame, and it ships flat, in a stiff card envelope.
30 × 40 cm Our favourite
The entry size, the most common frame size: IKEA, HEMA, Action.
40 × 60 cm
Bedroom and hallway décor, in 2:3 like a photograph. 40 × 60 frames at homeware or framing shops.
50 × 70 cm
The flagship living-room size, sold across the market. Shipped rolled, in a sturdy long cardboard box, home delivery only.
70 × 100 cm
The large wall size. 70 × 100 frames at IKEA (RÖDALM). Home delivery only.
| Size | Printed poster, no frame | With frame |
|---|---|---|
| A4 · 21 × 29.7 cm | €19.90 | €38.90 |
| 30 × 40 cm | €29.90 | €58.90 |
| 40 × 60 cm | €44.90 | Not offered |
| 50 × 70 cm | €49.90 | Not offered |
| 70 × 100 cm | €69.90 | Not offered |
| Print-at-home file: all five sizes, as a PDF and as a 300 dpi PNG | €8.90 | |
Prefer to print it yourself? All five sizes, each as a PDF and as a 300 dpi PNG — ten files, by a download link sent after payment.
How it works
- You name the place and write the reviews
Up to four reviews, each with a first name, stars and a line of up to 90 characters. A dice picks an idea at random, and you can rewrite anything. The rating and the bar chart work themselves out.
- You choose the style
A clean app listing, an old travel guide, a neon sign or a newspaper review. The reviews, the rating and the popular times are the same in all four.
- We print in Aveyron
To order, on 250 g matte paper: in our Aveyron workshop, whatever the size, and every poster is checked there before it ships. Or you receive the download link for the file by e-mail.
Specifications
| Formats | A4, 30 × 40, 40 × 60, 50 × 70 and 70 × 100 cm |
|---|---|
| Paper | Matte, 250 g/m² |
| Inks | Pigment-based, lightfast |
| Optional frame | On A4 and 30 × 40: wood, black · white · natural, with acrylic glass |
| File only | All five sizes as PDF and 300 dpi PNG, by download link |
| Brand | Dandymaps® |
| Personalisation | Place · Style · First name · Stars · Review · Opening hours · Owner’s response |
| Occasions | Housewarming · Moving house · Unusual gift idea · Christmas · Secret Santa · Birthday |
| Gift for | Friends moving into a new home · A family who love having guests · Friends who have everything · B&B and holiday-home owners |
| EAN code | 3701800802807 |
More gift ideas: A housewarming
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Frequently asked questions
What does the print show?
Your household loo as a listing, like on a maps app: a name, a score out of five, stars, up to four signed reviews, opening hours, popular times, facilities and the owner’s response. No logos and no brand names: the layout everyone recognises, not an imitation.
Is the rating really worked out?
Yes: it’s the average of the stars in the reviews you write, to one decimal place, and the bar chart counts the reviews at each star. Change the stars on one review and the rating moves, just like on a real listing. The total number of reviews is the joke: it’s derived from the name of the place and stays the same as long as the name does.
What can I personalise?
The name of the place, up to 34 characters; up to four reviews, each with a first name of up to 14 characters, one to five stars and a line of up to 90 characters; what follows “Open 24 hours” and the owner’s response, both optional; and the style, from four. Popular times and facilities are the same for everyone: they’re the jokes built into the design.
What if I run out of ideas for the reviews?
A dice next to each review picks a suggestion at random, stars included, and one button picks them all at once. Opening hours and the owner’s response have suggestions too. You can rewrite everything: what’s in the box is what gets printed.
Which size works best for a bathroom?
A4 or 30 × 40 cm, which are easy to read up close and come framed in black, white or natural wood. Four 90-character reviews fit in every size: if needed, the review text tightens a little to stay on the print.
Can the print handle bathroom humidity?
The paper isn’t made for splashes: in a bathroom with a shower, choose it framed, behind acrylic glass, and hang it away from the water. In a separate toilet, an unframed print is perfectly fine.
Is it a good housewarming gift?
Yes, and you can put it together as a group: each friend writes a review, then the print is ordered in the name of the new home. It also suits a B&B or holiday let, whose guests already leave reviews elsewhere.